two weeks

this isn't the fun part. and it is sort of dragging, tugging at my heart. my time in cambodia is practically over. just under two weeks left. maybe only three more trips to the village. this has become my life. it is now normal to me. i have been living and working in cambodia for 11 months now. and now it is time to go.

i hate goodbyes. and it is not like i can say that i will see everyone again. that is a promise that i just can't make. life has too many curveballs that make it difficult for that kind of promise to be kept.

i am sad. really sad. i love going to and being in the village. it is so rewarding to work with and teach chanty. i have enjoyed developing the organization, helping hands. the village has become one of my favorite places in the world. it is just so beautiful, simple, and an amazing puzzle of development to figure out. the sunsets, the frustrations, the little hints of growth, and constant education for the villagers and for me. this has been an ideal learning space. and i think i may have made some lasting change in the village, at the school, in individuals, and in the organization. there may be some improvements that will sustain. and that is the point of my work.

little Meach knows her name and likes bugs:
i sure will miss this little one. when i first met her, on a day i was handing out new ID cards, she didn't know her name. i did not even know if she was a boy or girl. she was so dirty. so sick. really skinny. she was terrified and would not let go of my skirt. she has been my buddy ever since. last week i tried to shoo a bug off her. her eyes lit up when she saw the giant bug on her shoulder. food! she sucked it up into her mouth before i could succeed. when i arrive at the school, she runs up and hugs my leg.

yii guon gives me a name:
it seems so long ago. during my first month in cambodia, i would spend my whole day in the village. i would go in with the morning teacher and help in the morning classes. then she would leave and i would be alone at the school all day until the evening teacher came. the first day, i just sat in the building, afraid to go outside. the next day i sat in the school yard. the third day, i walked about 500 yards and quickly returned. each day i grew braver and went farther. my first twenty minute walk grew. i was soon walking for a couple hours. after two weeks, i walked off the path and into yii guon's yard.i knew about three words and just repeated them while she laughed at me and kept grabbing my boobs. our friendship has grown over many visits. i still haven't given her the satisfaction of seeing my white boobs even though she gave me a huge gift, my village name. MEE means bitch. so she renamed me. On-ghan. so if you are ever in the village, many people don't know a meee-ghan but they know an on-ghan.

ran thear gives unique answers:
ran thear is a CIG member. she is one of the ten original. and she continues to come every monday and friday to learn math and literacy from the teenage tutors. the teenagers are the most educated people in the village. as time goes by, it will be amazing to see a wave of educated minds develop with the village. we start every meeting having the members state their name and answer a question. ran thear's responses are always quite unique. when asked about her favorite food, she said it was a certain part of her husband's body. the others joked with her when she became pregnant a couple weeks later. the children of the CIG members were my inspiration. they sleep in their mothers' laps as their mothers etch numbers on their chalk boards. they are educating themselves so their children can have a better life. and i smile just thinking about the better life their children's children will have. it is getting better. i am optimistic.

sopheap, who reminds me of a simple monk, loves all the newness he is seeing:
today, sopheap and i learned about his "one laptop per child" laptop. it sure isn't the easiest thing to use. i have spent alot of brain cells thinking how i will teach him. the olympics were on. each time he saw a new sport, he shouted out in awe. he saw water polo, the trampoline, the gavolin, and the long jump. it is such a treat to sit with someone who is so excited to see and try and learn new things. i think the greatest

cheang seit loves her baby, kor sna:
cheang seit now works for helping hands cooking the breakfast for the breakfast program and maintains the growing garden. she can now feed her children. i forget that first day when i met her and she begged me to take her children because she couldn't care for them. she is an absolute joy. sniffing me if i haven't seen her in a couple days. and little sna fills me with so much love. if i am at the school in the afternoon, then he is in my arms. and almost every time, he falls asleep in my arms. but he goes home every night to his loving mother. and for that, i couldn't be happier. my tears are tears of joy. i can't really communicate with them, but i think the feeling is mutual.

i will write more soon because these are full days.

Introducing the BagBag

yesterday, 222 BagBags were inventoried, priced, and labeled. tonight i am heading to the night market with a couple of them to see initial interest. there are already two fair trade outlets in the US that have requested samples.

this is all really exciting and really new for me. we are thrilled about this project.

there are now 52 "artisans" in the village who can create BagBags. (I am no longer calling them villagers because the handicraft that they are now creating is amazing.) we are working with rubbish collectors in SR to collect plastic bags for us. traditionally, plastic bags are burned or are left to clog gutters, rivers, and dumps.

cambodia's rice farmers are heading into their two most challenging months, planting season. these are the longest working days and food stockpiles are running out. the next rice harvest isn't until december. and the cost of food, petro, and daily needs continue to rise. the villagers eat 2nd quality rice that last year was 1,500 reil per kilo. today, it is 2,500 reil per kilo. with summer vacation coming, children are going to cities to find work on dangerous construction sites or in even more dangerous brick factories.


two-thirds of the families in prasat char village will not have enough rice to last them through to the next harvest. many have already run out. for awhile now, villagers have only been eating a late breakfast and an early dinner to postpone exhausting rice stock.

the villagers reaction to the BagBag is unbelievable. they are so excited, grateful, and motivated to have an opportunity to earn money. daughters are teaching fathers. mothers are teaching sons. grandmas are sitting with grandchildren. a single mom was able to take their children to the doctor last week. a woman is thrilled that she doesn't have to ask her abusive, alcoholic husband for money for food for her children. some high school students now have the fees to pay their teachers.

i have attached a document which sums up the project. if you have any questions or suggestions, i would love feedback.

and hopefully, someday BagBags will be available to sale in some retail stores at home.

BagBag Introduction - Upload a Document to Scribd

Read this document on Scribd: BagBag Introduction

malaysia

after singing the advertising jingle for months, larry and i were finally convinced to visit "malaysia, truly asia."

10 days. it has been absolutely surreal. i had no idea that malaysia was going to be so beautiful, developed, culturally diverse, and easy. we are spending the majority of our time on an island very close to the thai border, langkawi, and then a couple days in KL. we are traveling with great friends we have made from australia.

it really is a different place. i don't know when/if seeing a woman with a headscarf or a woman in a full burka would ever become a "normal" practice that doesn't make me feel something. its hot here. just seeing someone wear a synthetic fabric pulled tight along her forehead, engulfing the rest of her head and neck and down her back just makes me feel hot. from an ignorant standpoint it doesn't make sense.

and then i look off in the distance and see outlines of thailand. and women in thailand, maybe the other extreme. the passiveness of the women in the small, local government office where i used to work. (actually, work is too active a word. i used to sit and watch and read the newspaper.) the women were constantly moving, writing, typing, filing while the majority of men sipped coffee and made jokes that caused them all to giggle hysterically. it was a secret to no one about the village mayor's mistress. i would have to follow him around some days. an elderly man who spoke as much as he breathed. and then at night i would stay in him home with his wife and daughter who labored tirelessly all day on their pineapple fields. they never asked me about my day.

if bangkok had a logo, it would be a big neon sign flashing "sex, sex, sex." in english or in thai or any other language where the sleaziest of the sleaze come from. tank tops, cut-off shorts. tattoos. alcoholic beer bellies and chicken legs. i taught english for a few months at an ngo on patpong to woman working in the red light district. when asking for directions before my first day ... "the small door between super pussy and king's cunt."

so the difference between malaysian and thai women. society is society. it is not going to improve overnight. we can't control the world we live in. so we control ourselves and our family so they can live. does that mean with headscarves. i don't think so. but i can no longer claim that i don't sort of understand.

i just finished the latest book from my favorite author, jhumpa lahiri. i get a bit angry at her near the end of the book because i am near the end of the book. i can't get enough of her characters and their unfolding lives. two indian couples were sitting across from me at breakfast the other day. larry was still sleeping. there was very limited talking. an older couple and a younger couple. i think the older one was her parents, but maybe his. how did this couple come together? was it the parent's idea? i am sure the son and daughter had some input. but it was probably much different from the way young singletons become couples at home. i doubt match.com and coffee dates were used. but what are divorce rates like at home these days? what about in arranged marriages? i understand the different circumstances under which the respective ones are formed, but i am still going to ask the question.

just when i am about to get up, a new mother in her beautiful sari follows behind her waddling two-year old. we smile. then she looks sad, and asks, "are you alone?" "no, my husband is sleeping." she looks so relieved and happy. but in my opinion, she looks too relieved and happy.

after interneting i am going find some shade on the beach and read some more of my development books. society at home hasn't got it all figured out. but others don't either. do i have a right to go into a different society and think that i know ways to develop them? sounds so ignorant. but i want to find a way of bringing it out in them, assisting them on their path, and figure out ways to make it better.

time to read. a lazy morning before waterfalls, hot springs, kayaking, or hiking. this island has it all. along with great food. so eating will definitely be a highlight of the day, too.

chanty's web

so excited to make first web site

coming back

"would you like sweet milk or breast milk?"

what a way to start a monday morning! i had just ordered my usual breakfast at my usual breakfast spot. i order the same thing everyday. "cambodian stew beef with bread and ice coffee and a small cup of milk." i thought i had perfected my order. once i ordered cambodian beef stew with bread and they looked at me in complete confusion. i am such a creature of habit that sometimes they bring me my order before i even order it.

so you can imagine my shock with the question. after six months, i never knew that there was another option for milk. specifically breast milk. i hate the sweet milk. so i ordered the other kind. i am in complete denial that it is breast milk. i am going to think it is a brand name. yup. "would you like the wegmans brand milk or the breast brand milk?"

so, i have fallen back into the routine in siem reap. it was easy to fall back into life in the states for the month of april. it was a treat to see family and friends and enjoy some home comforts. but being a nomad is exhausting. thanks to all to provided us with a bed and food.

it wasn't as easy to fall back into life in siem reap initially. i don't have as much patience as i did in the beginning. the newness of siem reap has evaporated. unfortunately, a couple things had not been done while i was away so my to-do-list for work was unbelievably long.

but it has now been two weeks and i don't want to be anywhere else. i am so excited about new projects we are working on. so much great stuff.

Doctor Day Follow-Up
264 students were seen by doctors when Angkor Hospital for Children's Home Care Team visited our school. we are still summarizing all the findings. lots of worms, teeth problems, malnutrition, dehydration, skin infections, eyes and ears problems, and tb. this past week we organized follow-up treatment for 5 children. some had surgery, x-rays, and medication. the logistics will be a bit overwhelming but seeing this young family the afternoon after their daughter had anal prolapse surgery was so rewarding. her mom giggled at how much she kept eating knowing that her problem had been fixed.

Community-Income Generating Project
exciting things are happening with our cig group. they have been learning numeracy and basic math, enjoying team-building activities, having leadership discussions, learning handicrafts, and talking about business skills. the goal is to take this out of the garbage piles that get burned and create products using existing skills in the village. (these are chanty's and my feet.)

when i was home my aunts' taught me how to make a BAG-BAG. last monday i brought the sample, a crocheting needle, and some plastic bags to a landmine victim in the village. she has an amazing crocheting skill. i returned two days later to find that she had started to make the bag just by looking at the sample. i spent less than 5 minutes showing her how i did it. i returned two days later and she had made an unbelievably beautiful replication.

today, the cig group is venturing to her home (since she is unable to leave her house due to physical limitations) to learn how to make the BAG-BAG. i asked her if i should bring cake or fruit as a snack. FRUIT!!! she is really excited to teach. she has little social interaction because her house is on the outskirts of the village.

i have always wanted to work with an income generating group because i believe it is a hands-on way of combating human trafficking. i realized how true this was last monday. the group was giggling about an "ngo?" that was going around the village looking for 16 to 22 year old women to come to thailand to learn sewing. the family would have to pay 80 dollars and the woman would send home money. oh yeah, she has to be good-looking. members of the cig proudly said that no woman in this village is interested because they already have the opportunity to learn a new skill and earn money. i couldn't believe it. the next day we met with the commune leader and voiced our concern about this "ngo?" fortunately, he thought it was bad too and will pass on the information. we are seeing if women in other villages have agreed to go and maybe we can incorporate them into our group.

time to go buy some fruit. i have my first order for BAG-BAGS and am thrilled. i will keep you posted on how to order your very own BAG-BAG!!! i am sure it will be the newest fashion trend.